billyhoush.com

It’s Friday at the office before the end of the year. My division, Operations, was all caught up last week as our boss took a week vacation and didn’t want to leave things untied. Now we don’t have shit to do and just getting paid to talk about things we want to buy.

That’s all it is. That’s the system. What my dad fell out of and went against when my mom fucked him over. And what he’s all for now that he got programmed back into it for old age pensions and disability. It all comes down to money. Haves and have nots.

What I learned was either you ‘do’ or you ‘don’t’ and if you ‘don’t’ you got to ‘get.’

After all that shit. Losing everything and starting from scratch over and over again. I learned to get mine. Get mine big.

Think money, monkey.

I’ve been seeing a lot of black women popping up in my daily dealings with the devil. I fucking look and they look right back at me. I spotted one working the superstore and one sitting in her car parked outside the LCBO. Shit.

This monkey almost dropped his banana.

They know what I am, as soon as they see me, yet they are surprised that I do exist. However, I have not acted upon the impulse as I have some unsettled business that may be inappropriate to ape escape on.

Watch it, Housh. Your balls can only empty out as fast as your pockets with women. I need to fix this house before I start the harem.

They updated the proxy software at work which completely locked me out of eBay therefore rendering my job useless. IT was way too confused and lazy to properly address the problem so some dude just took me off the proxy.

I can look at anything!

Merry Christmas.

Holy fucking shit the Canadian way is sooo boring. No wonder all my friends turned into drug dealers and pornographers. Who wants to sit in front of a screen all day just so you can afford a bigger, more expensive screen to sit in front of when you get home.

Drink your brains out on the weekend. Something inside me wants to procreate but I think I just wanna fuck that bitch. What’s up with that?

Oh yeah. You need complete control. You need complete control of yourself. Emotions, physical, your cock, your wallet, all that. If you can completely control yourself you can take over anything.

Try it. After you finish reading this shit; slowly get up from your seat and try to feel every bone and muscle do it’s thing. Drag that shit out so you feel it. Learn how your body works. Learn how your motherfucking mind works.

Master that shit before you go out and embarrass yourself.

It’s hard to say. Life is pretty crazy. Humanity is so simple. Nature is humbling. People are easy: make them relate and they love it. Everything else pushes them apart.

I’m still a fucking mess but it’s no sweat. That’s life and I’ll just progress. Look them in the eye and make them empathize.

My brain is leaking all over the place. I have been repressing myself at work but I always do that shit at first. Like, you got to get everyone comfortable with you enough to gain trust. They see you are competent and can do your job successfully.

Then they start hearing the monkey noises coming from your cubicle.

I’m trying my best to pull this family together. I keep thinking about my dad. I took over his old room downstairs and moved the TV down there to play Wii at nights after work. There’s these damn photos of my dad with my twin sisters hanging on the walls. These photos were taking before I was born when they left Iran and arrived in Canada and they are haunting the shit out of me.

Dude, my dad is getting old. He keeps telling me he wants to go to Iran and asking when we are going to go. That scares the shit out of me. Not Iran…the fact that my dad says it’s go time now.

Fuck this winter.

We were shat on this morning. 15 cm of that white powder. I woke up to my sister screaming and my mom yelling at me to get my ass out there to shovel the car out. Man….

It wasn’t that bad. I think working out at the gym everyday is finally paying off. Now I can clear snow like no other.

Folks need to understand that it’s not cold outside or anything. The weather is fine, there’s just cold pissing icing rain dropping on your face that sucks.

Yo, sometimes it’s confusing cause everything is white and shit. Like sometimes I can’t find my house or way to work cause everything is white. It’s tough enough everyone being dutch in Grimsby. OH SHIT!